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Home --> Weddings --> Embarrassments --> Rubber Made

Rubber Made

Legend:   Groom's indiscretion with a bachelor party stripper is revealed by his failure to remove the condom.

Example:   [Playboy, 2001]

The groom-to-be swore to his fiance that he wasn't going to engage in any shenanigans with the stripper (don't we all?). But then came the drinks, and the striptease, and the howling from his friends. After a while, he found himself alone in a dark hotel bedroom and in professional hands. The stripper went down on him and apparently did the condom trick (having a condom hidden in her mouth and slyly unrolling it a bit onto him while working away). When he returned home from the bachelor party, his fiancée was awake. As he explained how the bachelor party was just like any other get-together, no big deal, he got undressed and removed his pants to reveal . . . yes, the dangling and filled evidence.

Origins:   The Condom "suspicious wife catches her husband at an adulterous affair through the discovery of some subtle piece of evidence the man has typically overlooked" plot device is a well-worn feature of our popular culture. Over and over again throughout the years — in books, movies, and television programs — hapless hubbies have neglected to check their collars for traces of lipstick, failed to remove telling stray hairs from their suit coats, remained oblivious to lingering traces of perfume about their bodies, and forgotten about those scraps of paper bearing scribbled phone numbers that they stuffed into their pockets.

Fortunately for us, urban legends change to suit the times. Plot devices may become old and tired, but in the world of urban legends when a tale becomes passé it generally gets updated to maintain its appeal to a modern audience. Our current tale concerning an unlucky groom-to-be is a fine case in point: three or four decades ago, a tale that used the word "condom" and depended upon a matter-of-fact acceptance of an engaged couple's living together before their wedding would not have gained much currency as it would today. But neither would an earlier tale have needed to include those details: the simple revelation of a married person's affair was once sufficiently shocking (or entertaining) to stand on its own. Now, of course, we require more than just the bare bones of the plot to be shocked or entertained we need versions with titillating details, like the one offered here. (In similar fashion, legends involving unsuspecting boyfriend/girlfriend pairs caught engaging in naked horseplay by surprise party guests — their participation in prohibited sexual activity being implied but never stated outright — have given way to legends with similar set-ups but more salacious payoffs involving formerly unmentionable subjects such as
bestiality.

How plausible is this as a "true story"? Certainly a woman (or a man, for that matter) can, with some practice, learn how to apply a condom with her mouth in such a way that the recipient remains unaware of the process. And the target of such a "service" (particularly one who had more than a few drinks) might, if he remained prone after the climax (and preferred briefs to boxers), manage to slip on his pants and keep the used prophylactic held in place. The chances that the condom would survive the undressing process (and that the partygoer wearing it would make it all the way home without once having to urinate) are rather slim, however.

Sightings:   In a vein similar to this legend, the affairs of a philandering lawyer were revealed to his (initially disbelieving) wife in an episode of NBC's Law & Order: Criminal Intent (episode entitled "Jones", original air date 21 October 2001) when he unknowingly dropped a used condom on the kitchen floor after returning from a tryst with one of his girlfriends.

Last updated:   9 July 2005

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